Facebook has been on overdrive this week, with the revelation that recently opened Heliopolis bar, the Garden, is the worst thing to happen to the world since the Nazis.

A young, cigar-toting Cairene had an unfortunate run-in with the guys who handle the Garden’s reservations after he was allegedly asked for his and his buddy’s Facebook profiles.

His subsequent post/rant spread like wildfire and was followed by a witch-hunt of sorts, as quintessential Egyptian gang mentality led to a barrage of not-very-nice messages on the Garden’s Facebook page. 

No one can argue the fact that this whole thing was handled badly, but you’d be a naïve Nelly to think that this isn’t the norm. ‘Screening’ happens at every party and event – does it make a difference, then, if it’s done in secret or upfront?

But with fingers firmly stroking chin, it had us thinking who it is the Garden would deem to be suitable…

The girl with the manicured-feet-by-the-pool profile picture.

I'd let her step into my garden whenever she wants - wink, wink.

The topless beefcake fresh out of the gym.

0% body fat, 100% approved.

Anyone whose profile picture is off Cairo Zoom.

PICK ME!

The Legend that is Ahmed Angel

Come on - who could resist those eyes?

Mark Zuckerberg
When you think about it, this whole mess is his fault.

Let's all have a group un-bunching of our panties and have a drink at the Garden this weekend - yes?